I wrote a post about “queerdom” awhile back—affectionately titled “Fuck Queer”—but I deleted it because it felt disrespectful. While I welcome raw emotion in my writing, the outrage felt visceral and wasn’t getting to the root of things. I don’t wish to deter people with seemingly bitter push-back against this queer tidal wave that so many LGBT today are riding on. Instead, I think it’s important to share where my anger is coming from.
Simply put: I care a lot about women. Women, young girls, and especially lesbians. Often when we care a lot about something, we guard it vehemently against any perceivable threat.
I suppose that, to me, queer is a threat. I’m still baffled at how people fail to see the misogyny and homophobia, or at least the illogical foundation, in queer (largely trans) theory. So, this isn’t an apology for how I see things, because I do think that “queer” women (who are actually lesbian and bisexual women) are and will be harmed by queer ideologies. Again, it’s just a transparent look at where my outrage comes from.
In everyday life, I have friends that mostly agree with my stance. But I’ve also been fortunate to have discussions with people who see things differently, and thus far, there’s been a pleasantly open dialogue between both ends. In any case, I hold myself accountable for two things: 1) targeting the idea, not the individual and 2) standing for something, not against something.
My outrage is in unity with women and girls, especially gay women—I don’t see myself shying away from that. But my intent is never to be bigoted towards any individual. Challenging and critiquing people can be healthy, but blind anger and ill-will is not. It’s a thin line though, as passionate critique can be often be misunderstood.
Anyway, this feels more like what I wanted to say the first time around. That there needs to be more of us challenging the widespread embrace of queer theory, particularly that which positions itself against lesbian and bisexual women. If people perceive that challenge to be bigotry in and of itself, well…that’s out of my hands.